Take away someone’s freedom and you basically take away their life. That’s why prisons are so effective in their punishment, as they are designed to strip away the freedom of those who are sent there.
Even a short sentence can be daunting, so you can just imagine a very long one. It was American politician Patrick Henry, centuries ago, who shouted, “Give me liberty or give me death.”
And yet, so many people take it for granted, until they enter into a relationship and only then do they realize the true value and importance of freedom.
Interestingly, some may actually enjoy this new feeling and don’t even consider it as a loss of freedom, while others think otherwise and bask in it, treating their shackle as if it’s jewellery.
Freedom means different things to different people, and freedom means something different depending on what gender you asked.
Men viewed freedom or the loss of it, differently from women. When a man gets into a relationship and eventually gets married, he often considers it as a loss of freedom.
In fact, the bachelor-night party on the eve of the wedding is considered the man’s last night of freedom.
“At what point did you lose your freedom?” “When I said the words I Do.” Some historians say that it is written in the annals of history that a man’s freedom is erased from his life with marriage and that’s why phrases like, ‘Tie the knot,’ ‘Wedlock,’ ‘Settle down,’ ‘Get hitched,’ are attributed to marriage.
No wonder so many grooms are nervous at the altar, even as the bride is smiling and is as cool as a cucumber. She knows that the little ring that she places on his finger will have the same effect as the ring that’s inserted into a bull’s nose to control him and lead him in any direction that she wants him to go.
There is a loss of freedom when you tie the knot.
“Every time I leave the house, I have to tell my wife where I’m going.” “Ha, tell her where you’re going? I have to tell mine who I’m going to see and what time I’m coming back home.”
The irony is, even though some men whined about this so called loss of freedom, deep down they like it when someone cares enough to want to know what they’re doing.
“Yeah man, I got tired of the bachelor life when I roamed the streets and answered to no one.”
So, loss of freedom isn’t necessarily a bad thing. But the women viewed freedom or loss of freedom differently. Many expressed that this loss of freedom that men said marriage brings, actually had the opposite effect on them.
They said that they now had the freedom to relax and be themselves. No longer do they have to put on false outward face, a cloak of deception, but now have the freedom to be themselves.
They can now be who they want to be. “Before I got married, I had to make sure that he saw me only at my best, but now I have the freedom to relax.” There she is, draped in her housecoat, bunny-rabbit bedroom slippers, head full of curlers, scarf and all, awash with liniment, bay rum and face cream.
The men saw it as a loss of the ability to do what they used to do, while the women viewed it as a freedom to do what they couldn’t do before.
The irony is, even though many men see marriage as a loss of freedom, they still embrace it and even enjoy it. Many take pride in saying, “My wife tells me how to dress for certain occasions,” or “Let me run that by my wife first and get back to you.” It’s a loss of freedom that many men actually embrace.
That loss of freedom gives them a sense of well being and belonging. Yes, loss of freedom isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
I wish for you all, a wonderful free new year.
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