Women were always expected to be second to men in all walks of life. They were instructed to walk five steps behind, do their bidding, be at their beck and call, and basically wait to be chosen when the men so desired. After all, it’s a man who sets his sights on the woman, selects her from the herd and expresses his desire to marry her.
In many cases he’ll get down on his knees and ask for her hand in marriage. It’s always been the man who makes the move. The woman just waits until he chooses her and proposes.
But what if the script was rewritten and it was the woman who took the bull by the horns by asking the man to marry her?
It has been known to happen and is not as farfetched as you may think, even though It’s a societal and historical fact that men are the ones who initiate romance. It’s the man who sees the woman, has eyes for her, likes what he sees, then makes his move.
It’s just the way it is, and is the status quo of romance. He usually chooses where they go, and at the end of the evening, he picks up the tab, swipes that card, pays the bill. But who says that is always the way to do things, What if the woman wants to exert her will and be the one taking matters into her own hands?
“Hello, who is this?”
“It’s me, Sharon, how about I pick you up later and we make a nice evening of it?”
“But I hardly know you.”
“It doesn’t matter, we’ll get to know each other later.”
Many men would perhaps feel uncomfortable with that scenario and not take too kindly to that forward approach. Just because she made the first move it’s perceived that she’s desperate. Maybe some women are, but perhaps others simply just decide to exercise their prerogative and go for what they see and like.
Some men may feel more than a tad intimidated by such an advance, and feel as if they have no control. “Not only did she offer to pick me up, but pay for the entire evening too.”
That’s another thing, should women pay for the evening? “That’s okay Gary, dinner’s on me.”
Some guys say no way would they allow that on a first date. “Not at all, and let her think that I’m a mean cheap man?!”
To step it up though, what if they’re in a relationship for a period of time, should she be the one to propose to her man? “Basil, it’s been three years now, will you marry me?” Most men would be nervous and be taken aback, for social mores are forged in the foundries of our history, woven in the fabric of our lives and are hard to deviate from.
To have her actually propose to him may just have him suffer a cardiac episode or have him flee faster than a fleeing rabbit. “Why Victor driving away so fast?” “The ugly woman just proposed to him.”
Somehow, there is some unwritten law that says that women must wait and wait and wait and never make the move. She’s not even supposed to ask the man for a dance.
What if the woman just met the man, and on that very first date, says to him, “I really like the way how you look, come let’s go to my house.”
The man may lose the thrill of the chase, the excitement and mystery of the journey and may even feel intimidated.
As you can see, there are drawbacks to when women make the first move. Apparently in our society, where as far as certain issues dealing with romance go, women must not seem to be too bold, but assume the characteristics of the dainty, coy demure damsel and not make that first move.